Are You Alone in Your Grief?
September 24, 2015 | by: Dale Thiele | 0 Comments
Posted in: Pastoral Encouragement | Tags: suffering, grief, betrayed, alone, helper, forsaken
One of the greatest griefs in facing a hardship of any kind is the feeling of being alone in your grief. Misery loves company, right? Therefore grief hates being alone.
In the night that Jesus was betrayed by Judas, Mark records that Jesus “began to be greatly distressed and troubled” (14:33). Certainly Jesus was about to endure that greatest pain and suffering any human has ever faced. But I do not think the physical pain and shame of the cross caused the greatest distress for Jesus. I believe what caused Jesus to be “greatly distressed and troubled” was the fact that he would be enduring the pain alone.
Jesus was abandoned by his disciples. Jesus predicts their abandonment (Mark 14:27), warns of their weakness (14:38), and watches them do it (14:50). Nothing stings like having a group of friends not understand the plight you are enduring. The sting is all the greater when your friends run away because of your plight. Jesus was very alone, humanly speaking, while facing his most difficult hour.
Jesus was abandoned by his heavenly Father. The abandonment of the disciples certainly stings for Jesus, but that pales in comparison with the abandonment of his Father. The only statement of Jesus from the cross that Mark records is “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mk. 15:34). Jesus, being the Son of God, the second member of the unified and intimate Trinity, enjoyed perfect, sweet, and unhindered fellowship with the Father. There is no greater joy than to be in fellowship with the Father (see Ps. 16:11). And Jesus, up until the cross, knew no other experience with the Father.
The sin of the world, however, was laid on Jesus on the cross. Jesus became sin (2 Cor. 5:21). And the Father, who is light and has no fellowship with sin and darkness, turned his back on his only begotten Son. In our finite human minds, we cannot logically make sense of a God who is one, yet three persons, forsaking one person of the Godhead. But this is the greatest “distress and trouble” that Jesus faced. Jesus was utterly alone.
Many things can be said in application of this great grief Jesus endured on our behalf, but let me dwell on one item: Jesus endured the grief of being utterly alone on the cross so that we would never have to endure grief alone.
The writer of Hebrews says, “He had to be made like his brothers in every respect, so that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in the service of God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people. For because he himself has suffered when tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted” (2:17-18). Jesus was fully human. He knows the physical and emotional and spiritual pains we endure. He was tempted to sin in the midst of those griefs (note: it is not a sin to suffer). Jesus does not stare blankly into your eyes, at a loss for words. He understands you and your grief. And he is able to help.
Hebrews closes with a reminder of God’s goodness and faithfulness to us: “’I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ So we can confidently say, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?’” (13:5-6). Be encouraged. No matter what trial, temptation, grief, or pain you are facing, you are not alone. The Lord Jesus Christ is your helper.
